OK, let me start by saying that this is one of those stories where you had to be there or you need to see an re-enactment to FULLY understand. One of the most comical evenings I've experienced. So here goes.....
It was a warm night, the beginning of spring. The time of year when all are eager to pull out their maxi dresses and open toe shoes. Which means it was DEFINITELY a good night to sit out on the patio at Sullivan's for their Thursday night jazz and Happy Hour. So a group of us met out there ready to have a good time and celebrate friends, blessings and Spring!! Little did we know that pure comedy and foolishness would follow us there. I would have to say it started with the early crew, my friends that got there right after work. By the time I arrived, they had already been there for a couple of hours and were a few drinks in......and it showed :) From some one getting buff in a week to borrowing your little brother's shirt, the jokes were flowing. All in good fun. Things started picking up a bit when I did what I am known to do best, attract old men. I don't know what it is about me, but they LOVE me and can pick me out of a crowd. I promise. So I'm sitting at the table, chit chatting among friends and my older gentleman suitor, is peeking and waving at me through the glass door. I smile and wave back.......first mistake. He keeps peeking and looking but I don't make any more gestures towards him. But as I make a run for the ladies room, he stops me to have a conversation. At first it is all innocent, but then he gets on his "mack" game. After he gives me his card, and assuring he will see me again so there is no need to exchange numbers, I leave and head back to my table. Once there, we notice that our friend has been missing for a while. We give it no thought for a while but after several minutes pass by, people become worried. They check the restaurant and the bathrooms to see if she is there....no sign of her. We call her cell phone and text her, no response. Patrons of Sullivan's and even my older gentleman friend, notice that we are perplexed and a bit worried so they help in the search of our missing friend. We are only seconds short of putting an APB out on her. We decide to go to the valet and see if her car is still there...if it is, we are convinced that she has been kidnapped. We go outside to the valet, and for some reason I still can't figure out, 5 of us go outside to check. It really wouldn't have taken all 5 of us, especially the older gentleman because he didn't even know what she looked like or what kind of car she drove. So as we are out there approaching the valet, one member of the search team exclaims "AWWWW HELL NALL" huh? wait a minute? what happened? "SHE'S RIGHT THERE" As it turns out, she is sitting in a car chit chatting with mutual friend. Again, once we realize she is fine, you would think we would take a sigh of relief and go back inside. But no, ALL of us approach the car LOUDLY exclaiming how worried we were. The other passenger in the car looked frightened. She eventually got out of the car and apologized for having us worried. You know how it is when you get to talking. We go back to the table to close out our checks and leave for the night, because we have literally shut the place down. As we are exiting, there is a group of gentlemen leaving with us. They are an odd bunch to say the least. One is reminiscent of Rick Ross and the other had on 3 shades of white...white pants, dingy shirt and cream blazer. They have become exceptionally loud and obnoxious. So of course I capture their attention. "3 Shades" comments on my clothes and is trying to persuade me to come to Dharma, the after party spot. I am trying to relay in a firm but nice manner, because I am scared of crazy people, that I am going home and goodnight. Well he insists on dragging me to "Ricky Ross" car and to have a seat. As he is taking me to car, my friend who is also waiting on valet, shakes her head and says "i can't" Clearly, this was her limit of foolishness for the night. I sit in the car, or should I say was MADE to sit in car, but I keep my legs on the pavement in case I have to make a run for it. Ricky Rozay is puffing the smokiest cigar I have ever seen and decides that it's time to get the party started and cranks the radio to the max. The car parked right next to us is the scene of the crime from my missing friend earlier. They are still in the car chit chatting.....one is mouthing am I okay and the other is laughing her head off. I am fine. They are crazy but seem harmless. I "raise the roof" a couple of times to the music that is blaring. I'm too close to really hear it all that well, but it has a familiar beat. Wait? hold on a minute....is it? It can't be? Are the really singing along? Is this their jam? Last night a DJ saved my life.....are you freaking kidding me?? They are bumping "last night a DJ saved my life" in the parking lot at Sullivan's steakhouse like its Freaknik or something. What thug blasts that song anyway? I make my escape when their part comes on and they are overcome with emotion. As I am about to make my escape, I notice that my friend has gotten her car from valet and rolls off shaking her head. Last words.......I can't.
Monday, March 19, 2012
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
The Good Wife
My mother was a home maker. Not quite like June Cleaver but there are several similarities. She cooked dinner almost everyday. She kept the house; cleaning and maintenance alike. She washed, ironed, went to the cleaners and put up all of my Daddy's clothes. She cut the grass and took the garbage out. She even grew a garden for several years. She made my Daddy's plate when he got home from work. She set up all his doctor's & dentist's appointments and even told him when it was time to get a haircut.
I clearly remember one 4th of July my mother left early that morning to get the grill started at her sister's house for the festivities of the day. My Daddy and I did not want to get up that early so we hung out at home for a little longer. As it was nearing time to go, my Daddy comes to my room and asks me where the iron is.....perplexing question?? Now let me explain something to you. Everything in our house had a special place and it was always to be returned back to its special place. The iron and ironing board were ALWAYS in the closet in the laundry room. It had been there for at least 4 yrs (as long as we'd been in the house) so this question puzzled me. Was he saying that the iron was not in its usual place and it had to have been me who moved it, because of course my mother would have put it back. But no, he was asking because in at least 4 years he NEVER used the iron or had cause to know where it was. This was an epiphany moment for me. My mother did EVERYTHING for my Daddy. He went to work and she took care of the rest. I kind of chuckled and asked him did he want me to iron his shirt for him. He passed me the shirt and said thanks!!
There were a few times out of the year when my mother would go to conferences and conventions and it would be just my Daddy and me at the house. She would cook dinner for those days before she left and give me instructions how to finish preparing it for my Daddy. Always told me to make sure I didn't cook his eggs too hard for breakfast. Apparently, I still cook eggs to hard for her taste. : )
She firmly believed that this was her duty as a wife. To take care of her husband and family. How dare these women not feed their husband and kids a healthy meal? How dare these women run around so busy with their own interests and not help their husbands and kids? Tragedy. She believed this so much that she instilled this into my home keeping habits eaarly. My daily chores were to wash the dishes, clean my bathroom and bedroom and empty the trash. My weekly chores were to mop all the floors, do all the vacuuming and dusting and wash, iron and put away my clothes. Which is all well and good. I was pretty good at doing my chores.....but not according to her standards. For example, I didn't see the point in emptying my trash can EVERYDAY....if there was only a little trash in it, what was the point? But she would often tell me "your husband is going to leave you.....especially if he comes from a nice clean family" She would also tell me that about how I kept my clothes. I wasn't as organized and neat with putting my clothes away and she would say "no man is going to stay with you if you don't keep your room better.....especially if he comes from a nice clean family" I remember thinking, my marriage is past doomed if a few t-shirts left on the dresser prompts him to leave. LOL. And she had this thing that all my weekly chores had to be done Saturday morning. No sleeping in for me.....get up and do those chores before 10:00. What kind of lady would let her house stay in that condition? LOL.
She had firm ideas about being a lady and what that entailed. She felt the same way about self preservation. It didn't matter if you were going somewhere or not, you needed to be dressed and presentable. She had 2 pairs of jeans that she didn't buy until she was in her 40's. LOL. And she only wore those to work outside mostly. She tried to instill that in me early also. She did not believe in spending a lot of money on "slum" clothes, as she called them. Dresses, skirts with pleats and church outfits are where she placed the $$$. I had to use my own money for the rest. I remember in jr. high school a couple of people thought I was sanctified because I wore dresses all the time. LOL. She said that little girls who wore too many pants.....well, never mind. But it is HILARIOUS!!! I got my hair done every 3 weeks like clockwork, same time she went. She still goes to Miss Josie to this day.....25 yrs now. As I grew older, she stressed the difference between a woman and a lady. She exuded lady hood. She wore hats to every special occasion, perfectly matching her suit. She still gets on me about not wearing a slip. Who wears a slip nowadays? LMAO. She feels that a lady should have a well stocked kitchen for entertaining. Her Christmas present for me every year is something for my kitchen. She has definitely passed down to me her beauty junkie habit. We both love perfume and new face cleansers and moisturizers. I'm also a sucka for body washes and body scrubs. She is the one who has me addicted to this $30 lip gloss. SMH. She thinks I dress weird because I dont wear dress slacks and a suit everyday, but every now and then she compliments an outfit. She always loves my earrings and shoes although she says I will get vericose veins if I don't come out of the high heels soon.
Whenever she comes to visit my house, she always makes a comment about how I keep my place. Surprisingly she says I am very clean, but unorganized. Which is true.....I still leave a couple of shirts on the dresser and papers on the kitchen isle. She always wants to "help" me find a home for my random stuff. I always take her to dinner or shopping or ANYWHERE else than have her help me clean. Don't want to hear all the advice. Hehe. I definitely can't take her advice on men. Its just too much for me, LOL! She is not pressuring me to get married or anything like that, but she definitely has her "signs" of who I should and shouldn't date......but that's another blog. And she always makes a comment of how much wine and acutriments I own.......
But anyways, I know this is a very random posting with my scattered thoughts in no particular order, but here is my point. My mother had a very traditional view of who a wife and lady should be and what she should do. Many would look to her today as the role model for how they think they would want their wife or mother of their children to be. I give it to her, she was good. She worked for many years, was active in her sorority and alumni organization and held the home front down. She tried to raise me to have these same thoughts and values...and a lot has rubbed off on me. I still don't empty the garbage everyday, but I do pretty good. In my mind, I would do things a bit differently if I were married, but here is one thing I can say for her and why in her position I would strive to be just like her.....SHE WAS MARRIED TO MY DADDY
I clearly remember one 4th of July my mother left early that morning to get the grill started at her sister's house for the festivities of the day. My Daddy and I did not want to get up that early so we hung out at home for a little longer. As it was nearing time to go, my Daddy comes to my room and asks me where the iron is.....perplexing question?? Now let me explain something to you. Everything in our house had a special place and it was always to be returned back to its special place. The iron and ironing board were ALWAYS in the closet in the laundry room. It had been there for at least 4 yrs (as long as we'd been in the house) so this question puzzled me. Was he saying that the iron was not in its usual place and it had to have been me who moved it, because of course my mother would have put it back. But no, he was asking because in at least 4 years he NEVER used the iron or had cause to know where it was. This was an epiphany moment for me. My mother did EVERYTHING for my Daddy. He went to work and she took care of the rest. I kind of chuckled and asked him did he want me to iron his shirt for him. He passed me the shirt and said thanks!!
There were a few times out of the year when my mother would go to conferences and conventions and it would be just my Daddy and me at the house. She would cook dinner for those days before she left and give me instructions how to finish preparing it for my Daddy. Always told me to make sure I didn't cook his eggs too hard for breakfast. Apparently, I still cook eggs to hard for her taste. : )
She firmly believed that this was her duty as a wife. To take care of her husband and family. How dare these women not feed their husband and kids a healthy meal? How dare these women run around so busy with their own interests and not help their husbands and kids? Tragedy. She believed this so much that she instilled this into my home keeping habits eaarly. My daily chores were to wash the dishes, clean my bathroom and bedroom and empty the trash. My weekly chores were to mop all the floors, do all the vacuuming and dusting and wash, iron and put away my clothes. Which is all well and good. I was pretty good at doing my chores.....but not according to her standards. For example, I didn't see the point in emptying my trash can EVERYDAY....if there was only a little trash in it, what was the point? But she would often tell me "your husband is going to leave you.....especially if he comes from a nice clean family" She would also tell me that about how I kept my clothes. I wasn't as organized and neat with putting my clothes away and she would say "no man is going to stay with you if you don't keep your room better.....especially if he comes from a nice clean family" I remember thinking, my marriage is past doomed if a few t-shirts left on the dresser prompts him to leave. LOL. And she had this thing that all my weekly chores had to be done Saturday morning. No sleeping in for me.....get up and do those chores before 10:00. What kind of lady would let her house stay in that condition? LOL.
She had firm ideas about being a lady and what that entailed. She felt the same way about self preservation. It didn't matter if you were going somewhere or not, you needed to be dressed and presentable. She had 2 pairs of jeans that she didn't buy until she was in her 40's. LOL. And she only wore those to work outside mostly. She tried to instill that in me early also. She did not believe in spending a lot of money on "slum" clothes, as she called them. Dresses, skirts with pleats and church outfits are where she placed the $$$. I had to use my own money for the rest. I remember in jr. high school a couple of people thought I was sanctified because I wore dresses all the time. LOL. She said that little girls who wore too many pants.....well, never mind. But it is HILARIOUS!!! I got my hair done every 3 weeks like clockwork, same time she went. She still goes to Miss Josie to this day.....25 yrs now. As I grew older, she stressed the difference between a woman and a lady. She exuded lady hood. She wore hats to every special occasion, perfectly matching her suit. She still gets on me about not wearing a slip. Who wears a slip nowadays? LMAO. She feels that a lady should have a well stocked kitchen for entertaining. Her Christmas present for me every year is something for my kitchen. She has definitely passed down to me her beauty junkie habit. We both love perfume and new face cleansers and moisturizers. I'm also a sucka for body washes and body scrubs. She is the one who has me addicted to this $30 lip gloss. SMH. She thinks I dress weird because I dont wear dress slacks and a suit everyday, but every now and then she compliments an outfit. She always loves my earrings and shoes although she says I will get vericose veins if I don't come out of the high heels soon.
Whenever she comes to visit my house, she always makes a comment about how I keep my place. Surprisingly she says I am very clean, but unorganized. Which is true.....I still leave a couple of shirts on the dresser and papers on the kitchen isle. She always wants to "help" me find a home for my random stuff. I always take her to dinner or shopping or ANYWHERE else than have her help me clean. Don't want to hear all the advice. Hehe. I definitely can't take her advice on men. Its just too much for me, LOL! She is not pressuring me to get married or anything like that, but she definitely has her "signs" of who I should and shouldn't date......but that's another blog. And she always makes a comment of how much wine and acutriments I own.......
But anyways, I know this is a very random posting with my scattered thoughts in no particular order, but here is my point. My mother had a very traditional view of who a wife and lady should be and what she should do. Many would look to her today as the role model for how they think they would want their wife or mother of their children to be. I give it to her, she was good. She worked for many years, was active in her sorority and alumni organization and held the home front down. She tried to raise me to have these same thoughts and values...and a lot has rubbed off on me. I still don't empty the garbage everyday, but I do pretty good. In my mind, I would do things a bit differently if I were married, but here is one thing I can say for her and why in her position I would strive to be just like her.....SHE WAS MARRIED TO MY DADDY
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Daddy
A couple of years ago BET had a reality show called "The Family Crews" It was based on the family of Terry Crews, the big buff actor who was in "White Girls" and the dad in "Everybody Hates Chris" It was actually a good show and he has a beautiful family. But that's not exactly what I'm blogging about. On the show he and his wife had a re-commitment ceremony of some sort and either he or the wife made the comment that the best thing a father can do for his kids, is to love their mother. I remember thinking, wow! profound! but didn't give it anymore thought because the episode really wasn't about that. Fast forward a couple of years later and I am reading the status of one of my FB friends. It was his 20+ anniversary and he made the same statement that the best thing a father can do for his kids, is to love their mother. It really hit me this time. Wow! Profound! But did I agree? And this was coming from men who have been married to their wife for 20+ yrs, was this relevant to my generation? I posed this question to my twitter tweeps to get their opinion. Most thought this was definitely an important factor in fatherhood but couldn't rate the best. But this made me start thinking about how this affected my life in how my father raised me. hmmmmmm.....
My mother was the primary parent in my life. She was the one who taught me the standard life principles & values.........made sure that homework was done, that I was properly dressed and fed, primary disciplinarian and made the ultimate decisions if I could or could not participate in something. I remember being dragged to meetings, her office and countless banquets and receptions with her at an early age. I could read her moods and predict how she would act and what she would say in certain situations. Still like that today. And what makes it worse is that more and more I now find myself acting like her. AUGHHHHH!!!!!! By the way, I am a TRUE Daddy's girl : ) I spent less time with my Daddy but he has shaped much more of my life values and personality than any other influence in my life. Hands down I spent twice as much time with my mother but my Daddy had the biggest influence.....how does that happen? How is that possible?
And I think it has a LOT to do with the relationship between him and my mother. Here are a few examples, factoids, and interesting quirks about me that I have discovered are directly linked to this
1.I cringe and get an attitude when men raise their voice at me. I'm working on it but I get the stank face when a man hollers at me. Why? Because I don't ever remember him raising his voice at me or my mother. He was seldom angry, but when he was, he said his piece and that was that. I know they had their disagreements, but no shouting. On several occasions he told me I was too much trouble with an irritated tone....but that was it. Now a woman can fuss at me all day long and it doesn't even faze me. LOL
2. I don't argue. I completely shut down and won't say anything rather than argue. I'll voice what I think and then I'm done. And that's usually after I have had time to process it. Or I'll hold how I'm feeling inside and walk away rather than getting into an argument. Why? My Daddy never did it in our household. I wasn't allowed to argue (or have an opinion LOL) with my mother and my Daddy just didn't fight. He used silence...and for some reason, that was worse to us than a shouting match.
3. I'm bougie. I like to stay at nice hotels, eat good food, and am willing to pay a premium on some items that I desire. I'm not putting down the Red Roof Inn or anyone who stays there, but I'd rather save to stay in a hotel where you have to enter the rooms from the lobby. Why? My Daddy demanded this for my mother. Before they met, she shopped at regional generic stores. After the wedding she shopped at boutiques. Not because there was anything wrong with the regional stores, but because he desired better. He was big on being exposed to nice things. He always said you could get some of what you wanted with patience and discipline. I remember every year he would take me to help him pick out the outfit and jewelry he was going to give her for Christmas. He made sure it was nice every year.
4. I'm empathetic. I have a tender heart and am very empathetic especially to those close to me. I cry at commercials, songs, movies, books, life, etc... If some one around me is crying, be it happy or sad, you can bet I will join in soon. Why? My Daddy was very sensitive to moods. If my mother wasn't happy about something, you better believe EVERYBODY was going to work to fix it. Might not have anything to do with what was going on at home but he would be determined to bring it to a close. Or just do something nice to make her feel better.
5. LOVE is an action. In relationships, I don't necessarily look for the touchy feely emotional words, but I crave the actions. Why? My Daddy wasn't openly expressive with words or real gushy with affection, but his love for my mother was clear. He came home every night. He answered all her phone calls...on the job, off the job...didn't matter. She always got the new car (hehe). He only said no to her on 2 real reasonable wants - a dog and a pond. All others were either yes or let me work on it. He wrote most of the speeches she had to give for her organization....even though he worked avg 10hrs a day and would be tired when he got home. If it was special to her, it was special to him. He could care less about Valentine's Day, but he always got us a little something : ). He didn't attend Alcorn State University but he purchased season tickets to the football games, went to the Alumni weekends and receptions, and was a part of the booster club because it was important to my mother.
My parents didn't have a perfect relationship. I don't know anyone who does. But I have never doubted that my father perfectly loved my mother. And witnessing his love for her has definitely shaped my outlook on life, love and relationships. I wish he was here to sound off on about relationships with guys. LOL. He probably wouldn't have much to say and look to my mother to give me advice, but it sure would be nice to hear him say "Drea, you too much trouble" one more time. : )
My mother was the primary parent in my life. She was the one who taught me the standard life principles & values.........made sure that homework was done, that I was properly dressed and fed, primary disciplinarian and made the ultimate decisions if I could or could not participate in something. I remember being dragged to meetings, her office and countless banquets and receptions with her at an early age. I could read her moods and predict how she would act and what she would say in certain situations. Still like that today. And what makes it worse is that more and more I now find myself acting like her. AUGHHHHH!!!!!! By the way, I am a TRUE Daddy's girl : ) I spent less time with my Daddy but he has shaped much more of my life values and personality than any other influence in my life. Hands down I spent twice as much time with my mother but my Daddy had the biggest influence.....how does that happen? How is that possible?
And I think it has a LOT to do with the relationship between him and my mother. Here are a few examples, factoids, and interesting quirks about me that I have discovered are directly linked to this
1.I cringe and get an attitude when men raise their voice at me. I'm working on it but I get the stank face when a man hollers at me. Why? Because I don't ever remember him raising his voice at me or my mother. He was seldom angry, but when he was, he said his piece and that was that. I know they had their disagreements, but no shouting. On several occasions he told me I was too much trouble with an irritated tone....but that was it. Now a woman can fuss at me all day long and it doesn't even faze me. LOL
2. I don't argue. I completely shut down and won't say anything rather than argue. I'll voice what I think and then I'm done. And that's usually after I have had time to process it. Or I'll hold how I'm feeling inside and walk away rather than getting into an argument. Why? My Daddy never did it in our household. I wasn't allowed to argue (or have an opinion LOL) with my mother and my Daddy just didn't fight. He used silence...and for some reason, that was worse to us than a shouting match.
3. I'm bougie. I like to stay at nice hotels, eat good food, and am willing to pay a premium on some items that I desire. I'm not putting down the Red Roof Inn or anyone who stays there, but I'd rather save to stay in a hotel where you have to enter the rooms from the lobby. Why? My Daddy demanded this for my mother. Before they met, she shopped at regional generic stores. After the wedding she shopped at boutiques. Not because there was anything wrong with the regional stores, but because he desired better. He was big on being exposed to nice things. He always said you could get some of what you wanted with patience and discipline. I remember every year he would take me to help him pick out the outfit and jewelry he was going to give her for Christmas. He made sure it was nice every year.
4. I'm empathetic. I have a tender heart and am very empathetic especially to those close to me. I cry at commercials, songs, movies, books, life, etc... If some one around me is crying, be it happy or sad, you can bet I will join in soon. Why? My Daddy was very sensitive to moods. If my mother wasn't happy about something, you better believe EVERYBODY was going to work to fix it. Might not have anything to do with what was going on at home but he would be determined to bring it to a close. Or just do something nice to make her feel better.
5. LOVE is an action. In relationships, I don't necessarily look for the touchy feely emotional words, but I crave the actions. Why? My Daddy wasn't openly expressive with words or real gushy with affection, but his love for my mother was clear. He came home every night. He answered all her phone calls...on the job, off the job...didn't matter. She always got the new car (hehe). He only said no to her on 2 real reasonable wants - a dog and a pond. All others were either yes or let me work on it. He wrote most of the speeches she had to give for her organization....even though he worked avg 10hrs a day and would be tired when he got home. If it was special to her, it was special to him. He could care less about Valentine's Day, but he always got us a little something : ). He didn't attend Alcorn State University but he purchased season tickets to the football games, went to the Alumni weekends and receptions, and was a part of the booster club because it was important to my mother.
Monday, February 6, 2012
I Got a New TOP 10
Hello my peeps! Guess what? I have a new top 10 list...woo hoo! This list came to me the other day while having dinner with a friend. By the way, I overdid it for restaurant week. I tried 3 restaurants and thoroughly enjoyed all 3. But anyway, this list was inspired by a manager at one of the restaurants. He seemed to be a really nice and friendly guy and made sure our table was well taken care of. My friend jokingly commented that he was making googly eyes at the table. Not her exact words but you get the meaning. It was funny because it was true. He WOULD be the type of guy who would approach me. And that's what inspired my top 10. here we go...... TOP TEN LIST OF DUDES WHO APPROACH ANDREA
1. Guys at gas stations...be it the old cashier inside or the random dude pumping gas...they LOVE me (may be the inspiration for a future blog, "Never speak to strangers at the gas station")
2. The dude in the gym in Timberland's.....really? Timbs are your gym shoes? (has happened to me more than once)
3. Security guards...not sure why and not a bad thing, but they LOVE me
4. Men with outdated hairstyles....jheri curl, box tops, afros
5. Seafood & meat attendants at the grocery store....not a bad thing either : ) (thanks for the extra shrimp!!!)
6. Voyeurs at the gym who are not even working out...makes me uncomfortable (don't look at me while I'm struggling and sweaty)
7. Married men....please go home
8. That random dude who shows up/calls every 3 months.....this may happen to everyone tho (you know, the guy who just checking to see if you're still single)
9. "Secret Lovers"...that guy who tries to get you on the low....no sir; unh unh
10. OLD MEN!! without fail, the dude old enough to be my uncle will approach me (I need to quit playing and take one up; it's obviously my destiny)
1. Guys at gas stations...be it the old cashier inside or the random dude pumping gas...they LOVE me (may be the inspiration for a future blog, "Never speak to strangers at the gas station")
2. The dude in the gym in Timberland's.....really? Timbs are your gym shoes? (has happened to me more than once)
3. Security guards...not sure why and not a bad thing, but they LOVE me
4. Men with outdated hairstyles....jheri curl, box tops, afros
5. Seafood & meat attendants at the grocery store....not a bad thing either : ) (thanks for the extra shrimp!!!)
6. Voyeurs at the gym who are not even working out...makes me uncomfortable (don't look at me while I'm struggling and sweaty)
7. Married men....please go home
8. That random dude who shows up/calls every 3 months.....this may happen to everyone tho (you know, the guy who just checking to see if you're still single)
9. "Secret Lovers"...that guy who tries to get you on the low....no sir; unh unh
10. OLD MEN!! without fail, the dude old enough to be my uncle will approach me (I need to quit playing and take one up; it's obviously my destiny)
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
I'm Hopeless.........Like a Penny with a Hole in it
"Hello morning, now when does the fun begin
Goodbye morning, sorry it had to end
But see I cried just a little too long
Now it's time for me to be strong
Hello morning, I sure missed you last night
Goodbye morning, you just won't do me right
I stayed just a little too long Now it's time for me to move on
They say I'm hopeless, as a penny wit a hole in it
Penny wit a, penny wit a hole in it, yeah, yeah, yeah
They say I'm no less, no less, no less, no less, no less
Than up to my head in it
Hello yesterday, I sure need you now
Goodbye yesterday, I just can't stay around
You see I cried just a little too long
Now it's time for me to be strong
Hello yesterday, remember how it used to be
Goodbye yesterday, I can't take you with me
You see I stayed just a little too long
And now it's time for me to move on
They say I'm hopeless, as a penny wit a hole in it
Penny wit a, penny wit a hole in it, yeah, yeah, yeah
They say I'm no less, no less, no less, no less, no less
Than up to my head in it"
Rachelle Ferrell
Okay, I know that sounds all sad and depressing but I'm actually happy today! So why did I pick this song? Because this song isn't depressing to me : ) Maybe it's the beat or maybe because it's from Love Jones, but this song actually makes me kind of giddy and girly. This is my "crush" song. People that know me well know that I LOVE crushes : ) I have all types of crushes......celebrity crushes, love interest crushes, and regular crushes. Regular crushes are the best. They are fun, flirty and no pressure. Anyone can be your regular crush, even some one you know you could NEVER be in a relationship with. You know him. The guy you work with. The really cute really nice guy that has too many kids and baby mamas. That young tenderoni or extra distinguished grandpa. That guy that lives in another city or state. That cute charismatic guy that is a PLAYBOY! Or that dude that just don't like you like that. LOL! There's plenty of crush material to go around.
But for regular crushes, there should be some rules, some limitations to this crush game just to make sure that......well........that you're not a pervert and to avoid any complications that might incur if you were to act on your crush.
1) Don't crush anyone that's involved long term...i.e. has a live-in girlfriend, wife, significant other
2) Don't crush anyone of illegal age.......under 18 or tooooo old........just PERVERTED
3) There's gotta be some shame or obstacle to your crush.....otherwise, you might as well go for it
4) No crushing your girl's ex........too much drama
5) No crushing same guy for over a yr.....you can go back, give it a break before it becomes obsession
But there are some gray areas.... what if the guy is an ex of an associate, not really a friend? What if the guy is a friend of a guy that's interested in you? What if an associate, not really a friend, liked the guy but he didn't like her? Hmmmmmm
I've had (ok, still HAVE) some weird crushes in my life. I crushed a guy once just because he smiled whenever he saw me and went out of his way to speak; I crushed one dude who's friend tried to date me.....I never talk to that guy anymore but his friend and I are still cool; I had an old man crush...he would have been perfect if he was at least 5 yrs younger; I had a crush on a guy just because of a face he made....it was such an UGLY screw face but it had so much passion...LOL!
Celebrity Crushes
Mike Tomlin, Nick Saban, Ray Allen, Sean Connery, Clint Eastwood, Tyrese, Reggie Bush
body crush = Toni Braxton & Nia Long....they're both short too : )
skin crush = Gabrielle Union
hair crush = Queen Latifah & Toya....Toya's weave is ALWAYS on point
Goodbye morning, sorry it had to end
But see I cried just a little too long
Now it's time for me to be strong
Hello morning, I sure missed you last night
Goodbye morning, you just won't do me right
I stayed just a little too long Now it's time for me to move on
They say I'm hopeless, as a penny wit a hole in it
Penny wit a, penny wit a hole in it, yeah, yeah, yeah
They say I'm no less, no less, no less, no less, no less
Than up to my head in it
Hello yesterday, I sure need you now
Goodbye yesterday, I just can't stay around
You see I cried just a little too long
Now it's time for me to be strong
Hello yesterday, remember how it used to be
Goodbye yesterday, I can't take you with me
You see I stayed just a little too long
And now it's time for me to move on
They say I'm hopeless, as a penny wit a hole in it
Penny wit a, penny wit a hole in it, yeah, yeah, yeah
They say I'm no less, no less, no less, no less, no less
Than up to my head in it"
Rachelle Ferrell
Okay, I know that sounds all sad and depressing but I'm actually happy today! So why did I pick this song? Because this song isn't depressing to me : ) Maybe it's the beat or maybe because it's from Love Jones, but this song actually makes me kind of giddy and girly. This is my "crush" song. People that know me well know that I LOVE crushes : ) I have all types of crushes......celebrity crushes, love interest crushes, and regular crushes. Regular crushes are the best. They are fun, flirty and no pressure. Anyone can be your regular crush, even some one you know you could NEVER be in a relationship with. You know him. The guy you work with. The really cute really nice guy that has too many kids and baby mamas. That young tenderoni or extra distinguished grandpa. That guy that lives in another city or state. That cute charismatic guy that is a PLAYBOY! Or that dude that just don't like you like that. LOL! There's plenty of crush material to go around.
But for regular crushes, there should be some rules, some limitations to this crush game just to make sure that......well........that you're not a pervert and to avoid any complications that might incur if you were to act on your crush.
1) Don't crush anyone that's involved long term...i.e. has a live-in girlfriend, wife, significant other
2) Don't crush anyone of illegal age.......under 18 or tooooo old........just PERVERTED
3) There's gotta be some shame or obstacle to your crush.....otherwise, you might as well go for it
4) No crushing your girl's ex........too much drama
5) No crushing same guy for over a yr.....you can go back, give it a break before it becomes obsession
But there are some gray areas.... what if the guy is an ex of an associate, not really a friend? What if the guy is a friend of a guy that's interested in you? What if an associate, not really a friend, liked the guy but he didn't like her? Hmmmmmm
I've had (ok, still HAVE) some weird crushes in my life. I crushed a guy once just because he smiled whenever he saw me and went out of his way to speak; I crushed one dude who's friend tried to date me.....I never talk to that guy anymore but his friend and I are still cool; I had an old man crush...he would have been perfect if he was at least 5 yrs younger; I had a crush on a guy just because of a face he made....it was such an UGLY screw face but it had so much passion...LOL!
Celebrity Crushes
Mike Tomlin, Nick Saban, Ray Allen, Sean Connery, Clint Eastwood, Tyrese, Reggie Bush
body crush = Toni Braxton & Nia Long....they're both short too : )
skin crush = Gabrielle Union
hair crush = Queen Latifah & Toya....Toya's weave is ALWAYS on point
Monday, January 9, 2012
Managing Brand YOU
So as I am preparing to create my vision board for 2012, one of the phrases that hit me for the year is "Managing Brand YOU". As a sales and marketing professional, I am surrounded by campaigns to get more shoppers in the store, to get shoppers to buy this or that product, to get shoppers to buy just one more time, etc...Everyday I am challenged to develop and execute programs that drive sales for the BRAND. But how does that apply to my everyday life? People have a perception and image of me...so what am I doing to mold and create that? What do people think and say about me?
So to get myself in line, I take the same principles used for branding a national product and apply it to myself. Let's compare:
1)Focus - Don't try to be all thing to all people. Nike has a really good focus area - athletic wear with primary core being tennis shoes. Although you saw it all over facebook, Nike is not really trying to make high heeled shoes, or fashion dresses. They are not into corporate wear, just athletic goods. So I have to take the same approach. I can't be every one's best friend, I can't treat all my friends the same, I can't spend time with everyone. I must focus on my core strengths, the things that I do well and the people that I vibe with most and focus my time, efforts and energy there.
2) Communicate with consistency. You know you're hearing a Pringles commercial whenever you hear, "Once you pop, you can't stop" or if you hear that giggle, you know its Pillsbury dough boy. Well, I must do the same thing. You should get the same me whenever you see me. Now, I don't fit in a box, but the core will still be the same. That I'm laid back, friendly, like to laugh, and will listen.
3) Differentiate with passion & purpose. BMW is the ultimate driving experience. EVERYBODY knows when you see red bottoms, that they are Louboutins. You will pay for these experiences, but you KNOW that this is top quality, lasting and always in style and makes a statement. That's the type of brand I want to be. That there's something just a little extra in me, but its worth it.
4)Position yourself or others will position you Does anybody remember what happened to Borders? They became irrelevant. As things were changing, they never did anything to change with the times. They got booted out of the market. Were they any different from Barnes & Nobles? No, but B&N didn't allow the trend of ecommerce to beat them...they became more sophisticated & expansive with their online offerings and Borders did nothing. I MUST place myself in situations with good opportunities for growth, around positive and focused people, and have a clear vision of what I want to accomplish. Because if I don't, others will sap me dry and leave nothing for myself.
Just some thoughts for today. My vision board will be done pretty soon. Excited for my 2012 goals : )
So to get myself in line, I take the same principles used for branding a national product and apply it to myself. Let's compare:
1)Focus - Don't try to be all thing to all people. Nike has a really good focus area - athletic wear with primary core being tennis shoes. Although you saw it all over facebook, Nike is not really trying to make high heeled shoes, or fashion dresses. They are not into corporate wear, just athletic goods. So I have to take the same approach. I can't be every one's best friend, I can't treat all my friends the same, I can't spend time with everyone. I must focus on my core strengths, the things that I do well and the people that I vibe with most and focus my time, efforts and energy there.
2) Communicate with consistency. You know you're hearing a Pringles commercial whenever you hear, "Once you pop, you can't stop" or if you hear that giggle, you know its Pillsbury dough boy. Well, I must do the same thing. You should get the same me whenever you see me. Now, I don't fit in a box, but the core will still be the same. That I'm laid back, friendly, like to laugh, and will listen.
3) Differentiate with passion & purpose. BMW is the ultimate driving experience. EVERYBODY knows when you see red bottoms, that they are Louboutins. You will pay for these experiences, but you KNOW that this is top quality, lasting and always in style and makes a statement. That's the type of brand I want to be. That there's something just a little extra in me, but its worth it.
4)Position yourself or others will position you Does anybody remember what happened to Borders? They became irrelevant. As things were changing, they never did anything to change with the times. They got booted out of the market. Were they any different from Barnes & Nobles? No, but B&N didn't allow the trend of ecommerce to beat them...they became more sophisticated & expansive with their online offerings and Borders did nothing. I MUST place myself in situations with good opportunities for growth, around positive and focused people, and have a clear vision of what I want to accomplish. Because if I don't, others will sap me dry and leave nothing for myself.
Just some thoughts for today. My vision board will be done pretty soon. Excited for my 2012 goals : )
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Happy New Year!!
Happy New Year!! I am really excited about 2012.......2011 was such a tremendously blessed year for me that I don't know if I will be able to handle 2012. in 2011 I learned.....
1. that I am a busybody
2. I am not shy
3. I have no energy after 8:00 pm
4. I am a very logical thinker
5. God does not call the equipped, he equips who He calls
6. I'm either feeling you, or I'm not...don't know the rhyme or reason
7. hurt people, hurt people....it's not always personal
8. Twitter is addictive
9. Old Navy, Off Broadway, Target, The Limited and Marshalls are the devil
10. I have to document events on my calendar
11. I sometimes find it hard to ask for help
12. I can't be everyone's friend
13. that saying no IS being nice
14. how to apologize for my actions and reactions, but not for my feelings
15. that arguing with my hair stylist is futile....and dangerous
16. I love my IPhone, but I need a real camera
17. I'm not good at working retail
18. I have some awesome people in my life
19. I am terrible at showing people appreciation and reaching out
20. that I am not getting younger, time to put some actions in motion
1. that I am a busybody
2. I am not shy
3. I have no energy after 8:00 pm
4. I am a very logical thinker
5. God does not call the equipped, he equips who He calls
6. I'm either feeling you, or I'm not...don't know the rhyme or reason
7. hurt people, hurt people....it's not always personal
8. Twitter is addictive
9. Old Navy, Off Broadway, Target, The Limited and Marshalls are the devil
10. I have to document events on my calendar
11. I sometimes find it hard to ask for help
12. I can't be everyone's friend
13. that saying no IS being nice
14. how to apologize for my actions and reactions, but not for my feelings
15. that arguing with my hair stylist is futile....and dangerous
16. I love my IPhone, but I need a real camera
17. I'm not good at working retail
18. I have some awesome people in my life
19. I am terrible at showing people appreciation and reaching out
20. that I am not getting younger, time to put some actions in motion
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