Too dark to be that ashy

OK folks out there in blog land, can I tell you about how embarrassed I was at my family reunion this past weekend?  And it's all my fault.  So every year, the opening day is registration and meet & greet.  Come as you are and fellowship b/c everybody is just getting off the road.  Well this year things were different.  And of course I did not read my package, but to be fair to myself, the package did not go into detail.  This year the meet & greet was a reception with a dais, and an emcee and keynote speaker and the mayor of Tuskegee!!!  I was soooo  inappropriately dressed.  I had on a tank top and short old navy skirt....not reception attire.  I was not the only one though, so it made me feel a little better. 

"I am not my hair"   Profound revelation I had last week.  It all started when Sunday morning I awoke to extremely dry legs, lips and face.  I didn't know what was going on with me.  I became extremely worried when I washed my hair and found several areas of breakage that were not there the week before.  I went into a slight panic attack.  My first thought was that all my hair was falling out, I was going to be bald headed.  I went into a tailspin trying to figure out how this happened, what did I do, what am I going to do, how can i go out in public?  After a few phone calls and putting 2 and 2 together I realized that some new medication I was taking was making me very dry.  Therefore causing dry skin and scalp.  The hair breakage was from extreme dryness.   So now that I had a reason, I stopped being worried and became vain.  Ugh, I am too dark to be ashy and worst of all, MY HAIR.  How can I style this?  Boo hoo hoo I'm bald.  I honestly went thru this for several hours until it dawned on me, why are you being so over dramatic??  It's just hair and it will grow back. OK, so you have some bad breakage, you are NOT bald, just a little thin on the right side.  BIG DEAL!  In 2 months, it will be back to normal, why is this such a big deal?  I started to think of people with alopecia and hereditary baldness and people who have undergone chemotherapy........and I'm crying over a small med side effect.  Am I serious?  I somehow felt my beauty would be diminished and even non existent because of this occurrence.  I had to remind myself that I AM THE SOLE SOURCE OF MY CONFIDENCE!!!! And regardless of what my hair looks like, I am beautiful and I am worthy. Now I am not saying that I don't care about my outward appearance, I most definitely do.  And I do things to "decorate" myself to make me feel pretty :)  But that does not define who I am nor does it dictate my beauty.

Thankful for Ponnie & Hester

This weekend I will make the trek to Tuskegee Alabama for the Harper Family reunion.  Even though I talk about how crazy & country my family is, I absolutely love our family reunion.  It is always good to get together and fellowship.  But my favorite part, and don't tell my cousin Terrence, is our family history session.  And the reason I say not to tell him is because the speech may get longer..... But anyway, every year I am in awe and amazement at the strength, love and resilience my ancestors possessed.  MY people built Auburn, Alabama.....the university and all.  I think about how my grandparents Lewis and Nanci Harper, with very little formal education, made sure all five of their kids graduated from college.  (they personally kept Tuskegee University in business : ) They emphasized education, staying married and not going to jail......and all their kids followed suit...go figure :)

While I am excited and looking forward to seeing my family and ready to go fishing on Herbert's land, there are a few things I am NOT looking forward to.... So you know I had to put them in a Top 10!!! 

1.  People asking me if I have a boyfriend, if I am dating, what am I waiting on, etc...... just don't worry about me. IF I ever marry, all will be invited to witness the miracle.  LOL!
2.  People asking me if I have gained weight.....heifer, yeah. Now what?  LOL!
3.  A DRY bbq......seriously, can we at least get some daiquiris??
4. The family meeting.......if you want it to change, plan the reunion yourself.
5. The lecture about leaving the reunion before church service......I'm sorry, but I need to be back home by 6
6. How HOT its going to be on the land........Jesus be an fence and a fan!
7. The family talent show....take that back, that's going to be the highlight....need to hear 'ol boy's song again
8. The meal schedule...are we catching our own fish for the fish fry?
9. Walking the mall, or anywhere else, with those Harper fam tshirts........just too much
10. the cost to board my dog.....my goodness, they raised these prices!!!

They say you are who you attract

I find that flattering considering the wonderful people I have in my life.  I have always been blessed to be closely surrounded by positive people and have made some great friends.  But here is my burning question......If I am who I attract, then why do OLD men always hit on me?  For real.  It never fails.  No matter where I am, in the grocery store, at the gym, in the club, the old dudes approach me.  They LOVE me.  WTF?  why the face?  I mean and they are bold too.  Pinky ring, Coogi sweater, cowboy boots wearing grandpas!!!  Just had to get that out.  I can't believe he just tried to holla.  I look a hot mess today....anyway random thoughts....carry on

Here's a List of Things I Should be Ashamed of.....but Tragically, I'm NOT

      Last night I was up reading a book until the wee hours of the morning.......I knew I should have been asleep, but the book had captured me and I had to find out what happened.  Fully realizing that the book would be there the next day and read the same way, I still couldn't put it down. I then started thinking about how I have been in this situation before, with the Twilight series, Video Vixen, The Coldest Winter Ever and a few others.  I distinctly remember one night at 2:15 am, and I had a sales appointment at 10:00 am, but I was still up reading about a teenage/vampire love affair.  smh Should have been and still should be ashamed, but I'm not.  Which leads me to today's blog posting, a few things I should be ashamed of about myself, but I'm not.  Please don't judge me.
1. I should be ashamed that it's taking me 3 months to get my closet in working order, and that I could only sleep on half of my bed because of all the stuff I took out, but I'm not. (got to do better)
2. I should be ashamed that I have a company car and all car washes are paid for, but on avg. I only get my car washed every 2 months, but I'm not. (now this is just sad)
3. I should be ashamed that my dog and I are the only beings in the house and we live in 2 rooms, but I have a housekeeper who comes 1 to 2 times a month, but I'm not. ($90 well spent, I'd rather do something else with my time)
4. I should be ashamed that I purposefully get to church late to avoid the praise and worship service, but I'm not. ( I'm good for one or 2 songs, not an entire concert)
5. I should be ashamed of how I talk to my dog on occasions, but I'm not. (get out my face, hope I won't ever say that to kids)
6. I should be ashamed of the nicknames I have for some people, but I'm not. (from Sanford & Son, to Reg)
7. I should be ashamed of my eating habits, but I'm not. (i have some weird cravings and schedule)
8. I should be ashamed of some of my shoes, but I'm not. (really hot pink heels, pink& grey& purple pumps)
9. I should be ashamed of my junk reality tv obsession, but I'm not
I10.  should be ashamed for losing the get low contest to Tonja, Kimberliegh and Chris, but I'm not. (actually, I am a little shame about that, i gotta practice)
11. I should be ashamed at how much I am on twitter during the day, but I'm not.  (hey, its my entertainment.  could be doing a lot worse)
12. I should be ashamed of my country ways, but I'm not. (it's who I am, i don't like shoes, say ya'll & git & finna, you can't understand a THING i say when I get very sad or very happy.  it all comes out)

Update #6

One thing is certain.......I will not be getting my fitness goal prize at the end of June  : (.   Nothing like wearing all white to let you know where your problem areas are!!!!  I'm not giving up though, I can be ready by the time we go to Miami, a little delayed gratification.

Friends.....How Many of us Have them

I love my friends :)  I am beginning to really see how God has always placed the right people in my life at the right time.  I need to start making a concerted effort to keep in touch with people who are dear to me!

Spring Fever & my Top Ten

I have a disease that wrecks your whole nervous system.  It makes me jumpy and excitable; ruins my concentration at work and makes me neglect very important chores and responsibilities in my life; I can't sit still.  I have.....SPRING FEVER!  It's that disease that occurs once winter is over and spring/summer is here to stay, when it stays light until 8:00 : )  I have spring fever so bad that I have begun to neglect my list : (  I haven't picked up a book in almost a month, only cooked maybe twice, not taken a single picture and haven't run since March.  What I HAVE done is successfully managed to spend little to no time in my house for the entire month of May.  I went out EVERYDAY and NIGHT of Memorial Day weekend beginning Thursday evening.  You know its bad when you see the same bouncer 4 times in 2 weeks. smh...it's a shame. 

But there has been a little progress made towards my goals. I have purchased a ticket to Memphis in August to visit fam there and I went to Cajun Canvas for a painting class with my Girl's Night In group.  It was a lot of fun and very therapeutic.  I would love to go again with a group of friends.....I should probably set that up. 

Ok so anyone that knows me knows I LOVE making lists.  To do lists, list of goals, any kind of list & I'm ready.  So I was having a conversation with a young relative of mine.  Nice young man a few years out of school and we were discussing serious dating and relationships/marriage.  Not sure how we got on this conversation but of course I developed a Top Ten list for him  : )  My top 10 focuses on the things to watch out for in women when in real relationships.......not saying that he shouldn't continue to date said women but to just be careful and proceed with caution.  He thought I was insane, I think its a darn good list.  My disclaimer is that I am in no way an authority, just my opinion : )

1. Be wary of women who do not have custody of their children..i.e. live with them - there's a reason
2. Be wary of loud women...unless they are hard of hearing - tend to have a need for attention and control
3. Be wary of women who constantly diet or talk about dieting - will find it hard to be happy with themselves
4. Be wary of women with NO male friends - its because she's slept with them all
5. Be wary of women who have never lived by themselves (excluding her children) - she has no clue who she is yet
6. Be wary of women who don't love your kids - if she loves you, she should love your kids
7. Be wary of women who with no beauty routine - doesn't have to be overly girly but not having one may lead to her letting herself go
8. Be wary of women who are in debt with no plans of getting out - just spells trouble
9. Be wary of women with no goals - she won't be able to help, understand or support you with yours
10. Be wary of women who don't read - from magazines to romance novels to cereal boxes- we're talking about the primary educator of your future kids........think about it