I have a secret to tell you......Gloria Jean is not my first choice. Shhhh.....don't tell her though. Gloria Jean is my car, a 2010 steel grey Ford Fusion. She now has 61,000 miles, a missing rim, a cracked rim, a waxed passenger seat and a chewed out front ventilation. You may look at her and think she is not the most attractive girl, or the most comfortable, and gets too loud and agitated when pulling small hills, but she has a hidden beauty. SHE IS FREE! Maintenance, insurance, gas, car washes.....ALL FREE. For the low fee of $110 a month, I get unlimited use of her. I can't personalize or customize anything on her, but other than that, her use is at my discretion. She has gotten me over some tough roads, some long rides and great times. But she is not my first choice. She's uncomfortable. You can feel everything in her. She is loud, when there is really no reason to be. She can never keep all her shoes on (rims).
I have secretly been lusting after different options....like a BMW 328i, Volvo S60 and Infiniti G25. I find myself during the day looking these cars up online, learning about them, reading consumer reports, estimating payments. I have set a time aside to go test drive and inquire about them. I kinda want one. But I know that makes no sense. Why would I go test drive something that I know I don't need? Because I know what will happen... I will fall in love and want to get it. Which lead me to thinking about how that happens in relationships and crushes and such.
Have you ever test driven a guy? You know, KNEW he wasn't the right fit for you, all the signs were there but you tried anyway. Only to fall to deep and not know how to end it.....Yep, I've been there. But why do we do it? It's not because he is so cute, or he is so rich, or his car is so nice. NO, all of that is superficial. We may gawk and fantasize about those things, but that's not what makes us test drive. What make us test drive is because he does the ONE thing that the last guy didn't. He compliments us when ole dude never told you that you looked nice. He's tall when ole dude didn't want you to wear your heels. He's into rap music when ole dude thought it was just noise and called you immature. And that's fine. You realize that those things are important to you and make a difference in your relationship. But you know you want more. You NEED more. And this guy can't or won't fulfill those needs. You know you're test driving a car that you can't afford or can't have....but if only.
Just thinking out loud......
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